Thursday, May 20, 2010

Day 6: Disney Hollywood Studios & The Orlando Airport

By the 6th day we were exhausted of vacation. It was time to visit the park previously known as MGM Studios and now it's just plain old generic Hollywood Studios.

Breakfast at the (W)affle House was missing some fried chicken but set the stage for a day of fine dining, busted coasters and discovering the joy that the Tower of Terror is different than in Anaheim. Star Tours has the greatest line setup in recent memory, too bad we were in line for 2 seconds. A freaking @-@?! Really? I got ripped growing up in Southern California, Orlando even had a speeder! Okay, I will put the geek in check before you get the wrong idea about me.

Our final day included another stellar shooting accuracy game/ride (I'm always glad to come in 2nd or 3rd place). As if I needy Buzz Lightyear to confirm what MIB had already cemented the previous day, I don't have the best accuracy and wrist dexterity to be a champion.

Not to be missed was the rare sighting of twin middle-aged mullets (stealth phone pic below). After a sleepy drive passed our hotel in our 4-banger Altima from hell we made it back to the Budget rental car return line with one employee working to check in 15 cars. It was like the Amazing Race but we weren't going to win any money for surviving the task. Once inside we were met with travel task #2, a marathon security check at the airport. Task #3: food before the 5-hour flight. Somehow we ended up at a freakishly frightening Burger King and I ordered a themed Whopper that was allegedly being delivered via the "food chute." If it wasn't fun enough to wait for my burger to get pooped out a chute it was highlighted by my luck getting stuck behind a non-English speaking tourist that had her children smuggle burgers and BBQ sauce right in front of a NTS guard. Classy Orlando, classy.

All in all, Orlando was great fun. I would do it again with the boys in a heartbeat (but not before visiting other destinations first).

Next trip - Jackson Hole in early June (more like a work conference but it's another reason to pack a bag and hit the road).

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Day 5: Universal Studios (Land-of-Irrelevance) & Islands of Adventure

The highlight of the day was the Popeye & Bluto's Bilge-Rat Barge raft ride. I have never been so drenched on an ride E-V-E-R. There are no pictures of the insanely wet ride because we had to rent a locker for our electronics (best decision of the day). The sun was not out in all of its glory this day so we walked around soaking. I opted to wring out my clothes but still spent most of the day damp (I avoided using the word moist because that's reserved for only describing brownies).

After we enjoyed all that Islands of Adventure had to offer we headed next door to Universal(ly lame) Studios. They may not have Back to the Future 'The' ride anymore but the park is a step back in time all on its own. We collectively decided it was the theme park of irrelevance (Terminator 2 3-D is still a main attraction along with MIB). Jaws was taking a respite so we didn't even get to see him lunge out of the water at our broken tram. Thankfully Bill Paxton and Helen Hunt made up for it on the behind-the-scenes inner workings of their new hit movie Twister (told ya - relevance!). There's something special about seeing a plastic and paper mache cow fly by attached to the same ropes I use to rock climb.

For those thinking Harry Potter is going to be amazing it at least looks amazing - we saw the kiddie coaster and unless they speed that sucker up it's going to be more Hufflepuff than Gryffindor. It's curiously close to Jurassic Park and makes for confused pictures (until you see Dr Seuss land and feel like you're on too much Xanax). The time spent eating at the Jurassic Park cafeteria I wanted to have a spoonful of Jell-O (that's the only time you will ever hear me say that) just so I could have it quiver and reenact the Raptor scene from the end of the first movie (you should see my Laura Dern impression, it's hands down awesome).

Ah, the memories. Thanks Bill & Helen (notice that I'm too afraid to even mention E.T., let's just move on before I have a nightmare)!

Monday, May 17, 2010

Day 2: Disney Recreates the San Diego Zoo

By day two we realized that our rental car was not properly sized for adults (glad I was the permanent driver, I never subjected to the storage shelf with seat belts that Nissan calls a back seat). 

It's a good thing the Animal Kingdom park wasn't too far away (and I figured out not to gun it through speed bumps, my apologies to Brian and Jason's craniums). Besides the joy of parking in the Unicorn section (real animal? possibly) it was great to look up into the sky and see all of the different messages God had for us throughout the day. The food was mediocre, even for a theme park and all the walking around resulted int the first signs of farmer tans (or in Bri's case, farmer burn). All was made  whole again with a trip to a Southern BBQ dive - man, I have missed ribs like that! We binged on red meat then stopped by the local grocery store (named after maturation hair growth) and bought a 12-pack of DP for Seth. 

(to be continued...)